28 August 2007

House Resolution 1: Waiting Period for Sexy Time in a New Relationship

House o' Dudes

1st Session

H. R. 1

To ordain and establish the requsite waiting period to have sex with a new significant other.

IN THE HOUSE O' DUDES

AUGUST 28, 2007

Mr. MONDAY MORNING PUNTER of South Carolina introduces the following bill; which was referred to the Esteemed forthwith

A BILL

To allocate and identify proper passage of time for hitting that ass.

Be it enacted by the House o' Dudes of the United States of America assembled,

SECTION 1. SHORT TITLE.

This Act may be cited as the 'Sexy Time Act of 2007'.

SECTION 2. INSTITUTION OF WAITING PERIOD.

The waiting period shall be considered expired when any of the following occur:

(a) Thirty (30) days from the first (1st) date,
(b) Sum of all dating and relationship expenditures exceeds $300 US dollars (USD)
(c) the Conclusion of the mutual watching of a second feature film with an 'R' rating or greater.

SECTION 3. DEBATE AND HOUSE VOTE

This ACT shall be debated and/or amended during House business, with the House Vote For Passage to transpire 31 AUGUST 2007 at 12 PM.

2 comments:

peter king crowned my ass said...

I have to spend $300 dollars for sex?!?!

That's bullshit. I say $100.

SportsGirl365 said...

Oh. My. God.

Fucking brilliant.